Expert Help for Alcohol Drug Problems Addictions Counseling Online

2009-10-22T10:52:00.000-07:00

What is the best way to stay abstinent from drugs or alcohol? The research is clear that the longer an individual remains in treatment, for example, addictions counseling and attendance of 12 Step Programs, the better the outcome. Attendance of 12 Step meetings, and involvement in the Program, such as working with a sponsor, having a home group, and being of service to others, are factors that support long term recovery. Daily reminders, such as reading material that supports recovery, can also be helpful. See http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com/GetHelp.asp#RecoveryTips for the opportunity to get recovery messages in your email every morning from a recovering addictions counselor with 32 years of sobriety.

2009-07-14T09:02:00.000-07:00

Alcoholism and Depression

Here are my ideas on dual diagnosis, also called comorbidity. 85 to 90 percent of alcoholics, depending on the population, do NOT have a coexisting (or pre-existing) mental health disorder such as depression. Often any depression or anxiety is due to the CNS depressant effects of chronic excessive alcohol use, which will dissipate with a substantial period of abstinence. If an individual has both depression and alcoholism, obviously, if the depression is severe enough to endanger the person through suicide or self-harm, then the depression will need to be stabilized immediately. However, talk therapy or even antidepressant medications for the depression will often NOT be very effective if the alcoholic continues to drink. So, generally, absent danger-to-life issues, the alcoholism should be treated first, that is, the drinking stopped and alcoholism treatment completed. Usually, if the depression is related to the alcoholism, it will not be a problem after 30 days of sobriety and treatment. Check out my website for more information and professional help.
Jan Edward Williams, MS, JD, LCADC
alcoholdrugsos.com
jwilliams@alcoholdrugsos.com
443-610-3569

2009-07-11T18:25:00.001-07:00

How do you treat alcoholism? First the alcoholic needs to decide, based on failed attempts to control use and avoid consequences, that he/she can no longer drink successfully. The next step is to find support and treatment. Often the best approach is to seek help from a professional addictions counselor or tretament program and begin attending meetings of the 12 Step Programs, namely Alcoholics Anonymous. Alcohol addiction is very powerful and most individuals need treatment and the support of others who have learned how to stay sober. Check out my website for more information, http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com.

2009-04-14T08:45:00.000-07:00

Just for today: this phrase is a powerful one to keep in mind for anyone seeking recovery from addiction, or the effects of addiction in a loved one. Just for today I can handle life's challenges without doing anything harmful to me such as picking up a drink or a drug, or trying to focus on controlling another's behavior. Breaking down my problems to those I must address today, means I need not waste too much of my precious energy looking at the past or future.

2008-11-18T07:59:00.000-08:00

Sometimes people are turned off by recovery in the Twelve Step Programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous because of issues they may have with organized religion. The strength of 12 Step Programs is that they urge each individual to develop his/her own understanding of a source of spiritual strength. Perhaps the best place to start, I think, is with the willingness to be open to the support of others in recovery who have learned how to not drink by using AA principles. The strength of the group can be the foundation of spiritual growth.

2008-08-29T06:22:00.000-07:00

Courage to Change the Things I Can

The Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. How does an individual in recovery find the courage mentioned in this prayer? As with most aspects of recovery, developing the "courage to change the things I can" is an ongoing process. The progress that you can achieve will most often come from improving and strengthening your relationship with your source of spiritual strength, your Higher Power. Ways to improve and strengthen that relationship include use of daily spiritual disciplines (morning and nightly prayer, spiritual readings and reflections), helping others, and asking for help from others, in recovery, attending 12 Step meetings and listening and sharing. Fear is normally a huge issue in early recovery. Ask in morning prayers and throughout the day for the strength to take risks and do what you are supposed to do. Over time, you will reach the point where fear, though present (fear seems to be part of being human), rarely will prevent you from doing "the next right thing."

2008-08-26T12:23:00.001-07:00

Is there a cure for addiction?
Most persons knowledgeable about addictions would simply answer: "no." Addiction to alcohol or other drugs is not cured by time abstinent from use of the addictive substance. There is no therapy that can teach an addict or alcoholic to use without problems over any significant period of time. Because of changes in brain chemistry and other psychological habituation factors, few, if any, individuals once addicted can return to normal, non-harmful use. The answer to addiction is abstinence from the addictive substance. Long term abstinence usually can be maintained only through comprehensive treatment that addresses the physical-medical, emotional-mental, and spiritual issues that are particular to each individual.

2008-04-16T12:03:00.000-07:00

Spirituality is an important component of the Twelve Steps of Recovery. Step 11 says: "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." Here is what NA's Basic Text says about prayer and meditation: "Prayer is communicating our concerns to a Power greater than ourselves. Sometimes when we pray, a remarkable thing happens; we find the means, the ways and the energies to perform tasks far beyond our capacities. We grasp the limitless strength provided for us through our daily prayer and surrender so long as we keep faith and renew it.
For some, prayer is asking for God's help, and meditation is listening for God's answer. We learn to be careful of praying for specific things. We pray that God will show us His will and that He will help us carry that out. In some cases He makes His will so obvious to us that we have little difficulty seeing it. In others, our egos are so self-centered that we won't accept God's will for us without another struggle and surrender. If we pray for God to remove any distracting influences, the quality of our prayers usually improves and we feel the difference. Prayer takes practice and it may be well to remind ourselves that skilled people were not born with their skills. It took lots of effort on their part to develop them. Through prayer we seek conscious contact with our God. In meditation we achieve this contact and the Eleventh Step helps us to maintain it."

2008-03-11T13:12:00.000-07:00

Just for today is a concept of great importance to anyone seeking to recover from addictive disease. I can abstain from picking up a drink or a drug today, but may find staying abstinent for the rest of the week, month, year, or a lifetime to be overwhelming.

2008-02-06T12:37:00.000-08:00

"I can't, God can, I think I'll let him/her": This statement is a short translation of Steps 1-3 of the Twelve Steps of Recovery in AA or NA, meaning, I admit I am powerless over alcohol/drugs, I've come to believe that there is a source of spiritual strength that can restore me to sanity, and I've made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of that source of spiritual strength. It's a nice shorthand way to think about the first three Steps.

2008-01-23T12:52:00.000-08:00

Why Complete Abstinence?

Let's begin a discussion of reasons for complete abstinence for recovering persons. If a recovering addict or alcoholic uses a substance of abuse other than his/her drug of choice, the resulting high or feeling will not be the one he/she is used to or desires (from drug of choice). That being the case, and adding to this factor impaired judgment that always occurs with drug use, there will be a high risk of relapse into use of the drug of choice.

2008-01-11T12:32:00.000-08:00

Self Pity

"Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink": Self-centered, negative thoughts breed negative feelings which can result in picking up a drink or a drug. Allowing yourself to dwell on areas of your life that are not as you want them and feeling sorry for yourself, can cause you to feel so miserable that you may revert to old ways of dealing with pain, namely, use of alcohol or other drugs. You are in charge of your thoughts and can refuse to obsess on negatives. Go to a meeting, talk to a fellow recovering person; just do not stay fixated on negatives and the painful situation will pass.

2008-01-03T14:27:00.000-08:00

A New Year's Resolution
Why not think about adopting the following resolution if it fits for you? I will try to be honest about how my drug or alcohol use is causing problems in important areas of my life, such as relationships, employment, my health, legally, and if my use is causing such problems, I will explore how to get some help. Check out this site for help: http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com

2007-12-29T15:46:00.000-08:00

The First Drink Gets You Drunk

"Think the first drink or drug through": Rather than focusing on the feeling, high, relief, escape, or whatever the short term result of using may be, think about the consequences of relapse. When a thought or craving hits you resulting in a desire to use, think the first drink or drug through, meaning, before picking up, recall the past negatives in your history from picking up the first drink or drug. Then, make a call to someone in recovery, go to a meeting, pray, do anything except using.

2007-12-20T16:05:00.000-08:00

Grow or Go

"Grow or Go": By not picking up a drink or a drug in the face of stress and pain, the recovering person can grow emotionally and learn positive self-enhancing ways to handle reality. The person who avoids growth by using drugs or alcohol or some other method of escape (for example, sex, sleep, food), will "Go", meaning he/she will inevitably relapse into use.

2007-12-18T14:21:00.000-08:00

Work through Situations

"Nothing is so bad that a drink won't make it worse": Here is another way to look at this saying. Taking a drink or a drug may temporarily give relief from the stress and pain of reality, but for the alcoholic or addict, using just postpones the need to deal with the situation and usually makes it worse. The only way out of a situation or problem is through it, that is, facing it clean and sober, trying to resolve it, and learning from it.

2007-12-16T15:05:00.000-08:00

Act As If

"Act as if" is a useful slogan for persons new to recovery. It suggests that one need not reach full understanding of, or belief in, the principles of spiritual recovery before taking action. Even if you do not think that the Steps of AA or NA will work for you, go ahead and act as if they will. Follow the suggestions of members who have discovered that the Program works, don't drink or drug, and go to meetings, and you will come to your own belief in the power of the Twelve Step Programs.

2007-12-10T16:07:00.000-08:00

H.A.L.T.

A final entry about using the mini-program H.A.L.T.: In early recovery especially, but at any time, take care of your physical, emotional/mental, and spiritual needs. Be gentle with yourself when you make mistakes, but tough on yourself also, meaning, regardless of how you feel, don't pick up the first drink or drug.

2007-12-08T14:36:00.000-08:00

Don't Get Too Tired

Continuing with the explanation of the recovery slogan H.A.L.T.: "Don't get too Tired" refers to the danger to emotional balance in early recovery of allowing yourself to become overextended physically by not getting enough rest. Fatigue causes even trivial problems to become overwhelming, the mole hill-into-a-mountain idea. A good night's sleep will restore one's ability to use tools of recovery to deal with issues that may seem insurmountable.

2007-12-05T12:38:00.000-08:00

Loneliness

Continuing with the explanation of the recovery slogan H.A.L.T.: "Don't get too Lonely" is in my view perhaps the most important of the four dangers to avoid in recovery. Isolation and loneliness are the hallmark of addiction. Most addicts and alcoholics feel alone and alienated, "on the outside looking in", "alone in a crowd", just not fitting in even with loved ones or friends. These feelings can be blunted or avoided somewhat by using. When those feelings crowd in on a person in early recovery, they can be devastating. So, going to meetings, sharing, finding a sponsor, developing a relationship with a source of spritual strength, are all ways to deal with loneliness, without picking up a drink or a drug.

2007-12-04T14:30:00.000-08:00

Anger

Continuing with the explanation of the recovery slogan H.A.L.T.: "Don't get too Angry" warns of the risk of relapse in early recovery by allowing extreme emotions such as anger. Powerful affective states can trigger your habitual response to strong emotions, namely, to use your normal coping mechanism, drugs or alcohol. A recovering person needs to learn positive ways to handle feelings that are available though use of tools of recovery available by working the Twelve Steps with a trusted sponsor. The services of an addictions counselor can provide a solid supplement to Twelve Step programs.

2007-12-03T14:35:00.000-08:00

H.A.L.T. Acronym

"H.A.L.T.": This acronym stands for "Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired", and is used as an admonition to persons new to recovery: Don't get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. Let's examine the first one, Hungry: Eating poorly, of course, is often a part of active addiction. Proper nutrition will help a person physically and mentally in terms of aiding healing of a damaged body and brain chemistry. As a practical matter, not eating properly can result in low blood sugar which can produce symptoms such as cloudy thinking, feelings that may seem similar to cravings or even withdrawal, or just a general discomfort. Because addicts and alcoholics tend not to deal well with negative states such as these, getting too hungry might just trigger a decison to use.

2007-12-02T15:54:00.000-08:00

Surrender

"Surrender to win": This phrase is one of the so-called paradoxes in the Twelve Step Programs. Basically this phrase means that by admitting to yourself on a gut level that you are powerless over drugs or alcohol, you are now ready to get the help you need from the rest of the Steps of recovery. Saying it in another way, by surrendering to the fact (based on your drug or alcohol use history) that you cannot use over any substantial period of time without losing control of the amount you use or without suffering negative consequences, or both, the conflict is over and you can now be open to the help available by attending meetings, seeking help from other members, and learning how to work the Twelve Steps. If you still have any reservations in your mind that you can control your use of drugs or alcohol, then you will, in my experience, probably choose to use again, that is, you will not have surrendered to your powerlessness over these substances. This basic point is the stepping stone for success in Twelve Step based recovery.

2007-12-01T15:31:00.000-08:00

12 Step Sayings
"First things first": this slogan has many meanings and applications. I'll just talk about one; whatever may come up on any given day, be it good, bad, or indifferent, applying this recovery tool means: "I still can't drink or drug."

2007-11-30T08:32:00.000-08:00

First things first

"First things first": this slogan has many meanings and applications. I'll just talk about one; whatever may come up on any given day, be it good, bad, or indifferent, applying this recovery tool means: "I still can't drink or drug."

2007-11-29T14:14:00.000-08:00

I Didn't Do That, Yet

"Yet": this word is a crucial one to bear in mind as a person recovering from addiction. Often, an individual new to recovery and Twelve Step meetings will tend to have an internal reaction to the sharing of drinking and drugging experiences by others at meetings, namely, to say "I didn't do that." For example, you may have that internal response to someone sharing about having been convicted of a DUI, having lost a relationship, or having lost a job. The point to keep in mind is that you have not had that experience "YET." If you were to keep on using, you could very well have the experience you are reacting to; so, adding the word "yet" may help you to identify in, not out.

2007-11-28T13:04:00.000-08:00

Act and Turn the Result Over

"Plan the action, not the result." This recovery tool has a number of meanings. One is practical: Instead of worrying endlessly about whether a proposed action will be successful, develop a plan, do the footwork, and act. Spiritually, this slogan means that you should try to leave the result to God, a Higher Power, or other source of spiritual strength. Over time, one's experience with this recovery tool will provide a basis for faith in the process of doing the footwork and turning the result over.

2007-11-27T14:13:00.000-08:00

No pain, No gain
"No pain, No gain." This common saying can be annoying when one is in the middle of a painful experience, but is, like all of these recovery tools, so very true. One can either rant, rave, and rail against emotional pain, or strive to accept it, live through it without picking up a drink or a drug, and thereby be able to grow spiritually and emotionally. As is apparent in looking at most of these recovery tools, it is how one reacts to the pain that is inevitable in life that matters. For the recovering person the only way out of pain is through it.

2007-11-26T14:07:00.000-08:00

The First Drink or Drug

"It's the first drink or drug that gets you drunk or high (dysfunctional)." This Twelve Step Program truth is the subject of some controversy to the person new to recovery who may argue that it's the 8th or 9th drink or hit (depending upon the drug and one's tolerance) that produces dysfunction, not the first one. The point is, of course, that if you don't take the first drink or drug you can't get drunk or drugged. Also, the first use can start, or increase, the cravings and compulsions to use. So, don't take the first drink or drug.

2007-11-24T15:14:00.000-08:00

Use of Drugs or Alcohol Makes Everything Worse

"Nothing is so bad that a drink or drug won't make it worse." This Twelve Step slogan means that for an alcoholic or addict use of a psychoactive substance to relieve the pain of a reality of life, or to avoid or escape it, is not a viable option. The only way to resolve life's problems is to use the tools of recovery and not pick up a drink or a drug. Working through issues can result in spiritual and emotional growth. Use of alcohol or other drugs to handle problems results in more problems, not solutions.

2007-11-23T14:15:00.000-08:00

Just Don't Drink

"Don't pick up a drink or a drug even if your butt falls off." This statement reflects the state of mind necessary for an addict or alcoholic to stay clean and sober, namely, to keep in the forefront of his/her mind that regardless of what happens on any given day, be it loss of a job, a relationship, a flat tire, a broken fingernail (sometimes it's the little things that irk the most), don't drink or drug. If an alcoholic or addict can at the end of the day say I have stayed clean and sober, that day is a good one, no matter what else of a negative nature may have occurred. Each day of abstinence provides confidence in one's recovery and an opportunity to learn from the events that have taken place.

2007-11-22T15:27:00.000-08:00

This Too Shall Pass

"This too shall pass" is one of the tools of recovery that can help you to keep matters in perspective. The vast majority of issues that plague us are temporary and do pass. It is interesting to try to think about problems that were so consuming a few weeks or months ago, that now are no longer in the forefront of your mind. A basic point of emphasis here is that whatever the current concern, picking up a drink or a drug will not only not resolve the problem, but for an alcoholic or addict will inevitably worsen the situation. Also involved in use of this tool is the fact that no matter what the situation may be that is causing you stress today, the emotional reactions you are having to it can be managed by sharing the issue with trustworthy persons or using a spiritual tool such as the Serenity Prayer.

2007-11-21T14:25:00.000-08:00

Keep Coming Back

Let's introduce some of the Twelve Step sayings that you will hear at meetings. These phrases at first glance seem trite and overly simplistic. I can tell you from experience that assiduous use of them can be helpful to recovery, even vital. One phrase was thrown at me in my early recovery seemingly as THE answer for almost every complaint or question I would find the nerve to ask: "Keep coming back." I could not see how this response was supposed to help me when I said I was lonely or angry or whatever. I now consider the advice to "keep coming back" as one of the most profound and spiritual suggestions that can be made to a person new to recovery. It really means: no matter what happens in your life, good, bad, or indifferent, just keep working on your recovery by attending meetings. I now understand that almost every problem can find resolution by not using and continuing to work on recovery by attending Twelve Step meetings, that is, if you happen to be an addict or alcoholic.

2007-11-20T13:36:00.000-08:00

How Often Should I Attend AA or NA?

How often should you attend Twelve Step meetings when new to recovery? It is often said that you should do to "90 in 90", meaning go to 90 meetings in 90 days. The way I like to make the point behind this suggestion is to say: Go to a lot of meetings as long as it takes for you to understand why people go to these meetings. The easy way to become involved is to go to as many meetings as possible in early recovery, to learn the language, to get to know people and be known, and to feel the spiritual strength that is present in Twelve Step meetings.

2007-11-19T14:04:00.000-08:00

Healing Power of Twelve Step Programs

Here is the basic mission of the Twelve Step Programs from the AA "preamble" read at the start of most meetings: "Alcoholics Anonymous is a Fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism." This simple principle is the spiritual foundation of all the Twelve Step programs, namely, that there is a profound healing effect when one alcoholic or addict shares his/her experience, strength, and hope with another alcoholic or addict. When this type of sharing is done in the context of a group of recovering persons, the spiritually based healing is enhanced. The best way to find out for yourself that what I have just said is true is by attending meetings of these groups with an open mind.

2007-11-18T14:22:00.000-08:00

Can You Trust the Twelve Step Programs?

It seems today that in the case of most opportunities to help yourself, there is a "catch" or some "small print" to be on guard about. The Twelve Step Programs are the exception. There are no dues or fees for membership; the members genuinely wish to help you without obligation. The "cost" of willingness to join AA or NA or other such self-help group is, however, high, not in money one has to hand out, but in the alcohol or other drug related pain and negative consequences that are behind the individual's decision to seek help.

2007-11-17T15:53:00.000-08:00

Requirement for Membership in Twelve Step Programs

The only requirement for membership in Twelve Step programs is a desire to stop doing whatever your drug may be (alcohol or other drugs). This basic principle is important to keep in mind so that you do not compare yourself out of recovery in AA or NA or other such self-help groups. You do not need to have lost everything, been to jail, lived on the streets, etc. All you need for membership is a desire to stop using; this desire will be the result of a host of different negative experiences depending upon the individual. So, what matters is not how you arrived at your decision to seek help, but the fact that you have.

2007-11-15T14:28:00.000-08:00

Types of AA or NA Meetings

There are many different types of Twelve Step meetings that can be found in the meeting directories available online: see Alcoholics Anonymous http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/ and Narcotics Anonymous http://www.na.org/, where you can find meetings in your area of the country. For this entry, I will just mention the two basic types of meetings: Open Meetings, which are meetings for anyone interested in Twelve Step recovery regardless of whether they have a problem or not; and Closed Meetings, which are meetings for persons who have self-diagnosed as alcoholics or addicts. No one stands at the doors to screen people entering to see if they have made such a self-diagnosis; the point is that these closed meetings are intended not just for people exploring interest in recovery but for people who have decided that they do have a problem.

2007-11-14T12:04:00.000-08:00

Newcomers to 12 Step Meetings

Because the newcomer to Twelve Step meetings is considered to be the most important person at the meeting, you as a new face may be called on to speak at the meeting. One of the great things about these meetings is that participation is voluntary. So, if you are called on, you can merely say, "I'll pass tonight", or "I'd just like to listen." If you wish you could say your first name, followed by one of the responses just mentioned; or, you could say your first name, and identify your self as an alcoholic or addict, depending upon whether you are at an AA or an NA meeting, and say you'd like to pass or listen. Finally, you could respond with your first name, and that you are an alcoholic or addict and say a little about yourself, such as, "My name is Jan and I'm an alcoholic and I'm new to AA...", followed by a short description about how you know you have a problem and how you decided to get help. The point is that it is up to you when and how much you will share. I will say that by letting people know you are new, you will then have people at the meeting coming up to you after it is over volunteering their telphone numbers and their help. Also, if you can share at the meeting, doing so helps you to feel a part of the group.

2007-11-13T14:48:00.000-08:00

Fears about Going to 12 Step Meetings

Let's talk about some common concerns people new to Twelve Step meetings may have. Some worry they will see someone they know at a meeting. Although it may feel awkward, remember three things: the person you know is there for the same reason you are, a drug or alcohol problem; depending on how long the other person has been in recovery, he/she may be just as worried as you are; and, finally, remember that these programs are based on anonymity, a confidentiality tradition that rarely is breached. In all the years that I have attended twelve step meetings, I have never, to my knowledge, suffered any negatives because someone knew that I attended those meetings.

2007-11-12T14:14:00.000-08:00

Tips for Those New to 12 Step Programs

Here are more tips for someone attending Twelve Step meetings for the first time: Be a student; soak up information that will help you to stay clean and sober today; learn your new language of recovery. Try to identify in rather than identify out, that is, listen for details and facts shared by other recovering individuals that you CAN identify with. When you hear something that you can't identify with, just set aside the information for possible use later, or, rather than saying "that didn't happen to me", say "that hasn't happened to me, YET."

2007-11-11T15:06:00.001-08:00

New to AA or NA?

The best way to prepare yourself for attending your first Twelve Step meeting is to have an open mind, setting aside any negative ideas you may have about these groups. Remember that AA or NA meetings are run by their members who are not professional therapists but individuals from all walks of life who attend meetings to help themselves and others to stay away from alcohol or other drugs. Also know that members of these self-help groups consider newcomers not to be people who have to prove themselves before they are accepted, but as 'the most important people at the meetings." Recovering alcoholics and addicts who have been clean and sober for a period of time truly welcome the opportunity to help persons new to recovery because, as it is often said in AA and NA, "in order to keep my sobriety, I have to give it away" (by helping the new person).

2007-11-10T14:37:00.000-08:00

What Are AA and NA?

Let's talk for a while here about the Twelve Step Programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. These self-help fellowships are autonomous organizations that are not affiliated with any outside enterprises, including churches or treatment programs. They are based on the profoundly powerful but simple concept that human beings with drug or alcohol addiction are uniquely suited to helping others suffering from the same problem through sharing and applying spiritual principles. A saying often heard in these programs is: "We can do together what I cannot do alone." Newcomers to AA or NA and recovery who often are leery of talk about God, Higher Power, or spirituality, can be comfortable with the support that is available from a group of recovering individuals or addicts.

2007-11-08T14:22:00.000-08:00

More on One Day at at Time

I will end the subject of living one day at a time with a quote from the 12 Step literature that I love. "It is not the experience of TODAY that drives men mad--it is remorse or bitterness for something which happened YESTERDAY, and the dread of what TOMORROW may bring. Let, us, therefore, live but one day at a time."

2007-11-07T12:52:00.000-08:00

One Day at a Time
Continuing to talk about the value in recovery of the concept of living one day at a time, consider this idea: "Today is your past of tomorrow." Facing each day's challenges without using drugs or alcohol will build a solid foundation for recovery that is based on your own personal experience.

2007-11-04T12:59:00.000-08:00

One Day at a Time

Let's begin to talk about recovery--what to do if you've decided to abstain from use of your substance. Perhaps one of the most important practical concepts for early recovery is the well-known, and therefore, perhaps not fully appreciated, idea of living one day at a time. Today is truly the only day you have, and is the only day you have to stay clean and sober. You don't have to not use the rest of your life. You need only decide to not use for today. This recovery tool can be helpful in many ways, and I will post some more thoughts about it in the next days.

2007-11-04T12:56:00.000-08:00

Self-Honesty

Living with addiction in someone close results in focus on the addicted person, on surviving, on trying to reduce the damage caused by addiction, etc., meaning that you rarely focus on yourself, who you are, what your needs are, how your thinking and behavior may have become a part of the addiction problem without your knowledge. The point here is that one of the major tasks of recovery is to learn self-honesty; to learn who you are and what about you that you wish to change. One of the best ways to find out these things is to attend a lot of Al-Anon and Nar-Anon meetings (the 12 Step groups for persons in relationship with an alcoholic or addict); there you will see yourself mirrored in others who share their journey in recovery. There you will also find the hope and strength to begin to know yourself and change.

2007-11-03T16:31:00.000-07:00

Concerned about How Much or How Often You Use?

Have you been thinking for some time that you should cut down on, or control, your use of drugs or alcohol? If so, then you may have a problem with control over the amount you use, or how often you use, or both. Try one of the free screening tests on this site: http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com/freescreeningtests.html

2007-11-02T13:21:00.000-07:00

Another Drug or Alcohol Problem Indicator

Thinking over the past six months or so, would you say that because of your drug or alcohol use you have given up, or reduced, important social, work, or recreational activities? If so, then try one of the free screening tests on this site. You may need addictions treatment. See http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com

2007-11-01T13:42:00.000-07:00

Another Indicator of a Problem

Another way to judge whether you may have a problem with alcohol or other drugs is to ask yourself if you spend significant periods of time thinking about when you can use again, or trying to rationalize or justify using again, or saying to yourself "I'll never...[fill in the blank with any negative behavior under the influence that you swear you'll never do again..."]. Preoccupation with drug or alcohol use is a sign of a problem. Take one of the free, confidential screening tests on this site: http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com/freescreeningtests.html

2007-10-31T12:42:00.000-07:00

Has your physician suggested that you not drink (or use drugs) because of a medical condition, or because you are taking medication that might interact negatively with alcohol or other drugs? If so, and you continue to use anyway, you probably have an unhealthy relationship with the substance. Try taking one of the free screening tests on this site: http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com/freescreeningtests.html

2007-10-24T16:34:00.000-07:00

Why do most persons with a drug or alcohol problem think they don't have a problem?

There is a one word answer to this question: Denial, but a word that need many words to explain. Basically, the alcoholic or addict has unknowingly developed a lot of mental defenses to avoid recognizing he/she has a problem. Some of these defenses are called rationalization, justification, minimization, externalization, and have definitions that match what they sound like. The alcoholic's and addict's basic drive is to defend the right to continue using. The rationalizing, justifying, and other defenses are all aimed at not having to admit the need to stop using. You can see, I hope, how powerful addiction really is. The more intelligent you are, the more sophisticated your denial system.

2007-10-21T15:54:00.001-07:00

Behaviors while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs that go against your value system can be a sign of an addiction problem. Some examples are: being unfaithful to your spouse, lover, or partner, and negative personality change resulting in arguments, combative behavior. If these behaviors occur regularly, you probably need to seek some help.

2007-10-18T14:44:00.000-07:00

Can You Hold Your Liquor?

Do you have a high tolerance for alcohol? Are you often the one who takes care of your intoxicated friends even though you drank as much as they did? A high tolerance for alcohol can be a significant indicator of the potential to develop alcoholism. Take the free screening test available on this site and explore the other alcohol abuse information on this site.

2007-10-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

SPIRITUALITY

I will suggest in this post some tools that you can use on a daily basis to be drug and alcohol free that can become a part of your own personal recovery program.

Consider setting aside a quiet time every morning to focus on the fact that you are in recovery and to make a conscious commitment to yourself each morning to be abstinent from drug or alcohol use for that day. This daily discipline can become a basic recovery tool for you.At night before retiring for the day, take a few minutes for some quiet time to review the day. If you have not picked up an alcoholic drink or a drug, you can be grateful for that miracle regardless of whatever negative or positive events that have occurred. It is indeed a miracle for an addict or alcoholic to get through a day without using. Again, this daily discipline of reviewing the day before sleeping and being thankful for another day of recovery can become a basic recovery tool for you.

I am now going to suggest that you consider adding a spiritual component to your daily disciplines. I will begin the discussion of spirituality by just making a few observations and asking that the reader of this post try to have an open mind to the concept of spirituality. I use the term spirituality to include any source of strength that you are open to tapping into. Spirituality can be found in organized religions and can be based upon a relationship an individual develops with God. But, spirituality can be developed apart from organized religion and can be based on one's own concept of a source of spiritual strength. So, for now, I suggest that the reader just have an open mind about finding a source of spiritual strength.Willingness to seek a source of spiritual strength, regardless of how that source is defined, is the key to developing a relationship with such a spiritual source. The willingness often is the result of finding that one's own efforts to resolve the drug or alcohol problem have failed.

In my experience, all an individual need do is to adopt daily spiritual disciplines through which the individual reaches out to a source of spiritual strength by prayer, by meditation, by journaling, or in some other way by methodically seeking help, support, and strength from a source outside of, or within, self. It is in the seeking of spiritual strength that one builds an experience based faith in the process and a relationship with a source of spiritual strength. Of course, it is essential that the alcoholic or addict surrender to the fact that use of alcohol or other drugs is no longer a viable option.

Returning to the concept I mentioned in the first paragraph, I will describe now a simple daily program of spiritual disciplines that I have used for 29 years in support of my own recovery. I often guarantee to individuals I counsel that if they commit to such a program and abstain from drug or alcohol use, they will come to experience a serenity and strength that will sustain them no matter what happens in their lives, positive or negative. Set aside a time for quiet reflection on arising at the start of the day and on retiring at the end of the day to focus on your recovery, as follows: on arising, read something positive (for example, a daily meditation book), or perhaps meditate on aspects of your life for which you can be grateful, recommit yourself to abstinence and recovery for that day, and ask for help from whatever your source of spiritual strength may be to stay clean and sober and to strive for a loving response to whatever occurs during the day. At night before retiring, review your day, reflect gratefully that you have not used drugs or alcohol that day, and ask for help in any way that works for you to improve in your reactions that day that may not have been as loving or positive as you would have liked.

In my view, any individual in recovery from drug or alcohol addiction who can get through the day without using can claim a spiritual victory regardless of other calamities or negatives that might have occurred.Performing these spiritual disciplines in the morning and evening, not picking up a drink or a drug, and if at all possible attending a 12 Step meeting, will over a period of time result in your coming to believe in a spiritual source of strength and the process, and can form the foundation of a solid, enduring recovery.

2007-10-13T11:06:00.000-07:00

Think! is a concept that can be very useful to individuals in recovery from addictive disease. First, the recovering person must think the first drink or drug through, meaning, before picking up, think of how the first drink or drug has caused you so much past pain and consequences. Secondly, think about all of your contemplated actions in terms of their potential to set you up for, or put you at risk for, a relapse into active addiction. Use your expert knowledge about your addiction to avoid situations and experiences that may be dangerous for you, especially if you are in early recovery. So, THINK.

2007-10-12T18:48:00.000-07:00

Thomas Jefferson said: "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance."

Let's add a couple of words to make the statement applicable to recovery from addictive disease: "The price of freedom [from addiction] is eternal vigilance."

It is vital that a recovering addict or alcoholic find some way to remember, hopefully on a daily basis, that time does not cure addiction and that he/she must be forever vigilant in awareness of any thought or behavior creeping in to weaken the commitment to abstinence from drug or alcohol use. A wonderfully rewarding and effective way to remain eternally vigilant about recovery is to regularly attend meetings of Twelve Step Groups such as AA or NA.

2007-10-11T14:23:00.000-07:00

The Role of Denial in the Power of Addictive Disease

Persons with addictive disease continue to use their substances in the face of a long history of adverse consequences in significant areas of their lives, including medical problems, legal problems, relational problems, and employment problems. The drive to use is stronger than one’s love for a significant other or a child; stronger than loyalty to an employer or a friend; and stronger than one’s values or even spiritual tenets. Persons with addictive disease continue to use long after any rational individual would choose to do so. This article provides a brief explanation of the role of denial in the power of addiction.

Some definitions

The term drug or alcohol addiction is used to mean a primary, chronic, disease, with genetic, psychosocial, and environmental factors influencing its development and manifestations. It is characterized by behaviors that include one or more of the following: impaired control over drug use, compulsive use, craving, and continued use in the face of adverse consequences. Addiction can develop with frequency of use of as little as two-to-three times a week. An example of addictive disease is alcoholism, or heroin addiction.

A person with addiction may, or may not, develop physical dependence and experience physical withdrawal symptoms upon stopping use; physical dependence usually requires use of alcohol or other drugs many times a day, every day, for a substantial period of time. A diagnosis of addiction does not require the presence of physical dependence.

Denial

Denial is a complex concept that includes many factors. We will focus here on factors commonly understood in the addictions treatment field to operate to cause the addicted person to be out of touch with the reality of the adverse effects of drug or alcohol use. We will use simple understandable, non-technical terms.

Denial in the alcohol or other drug (AOD) addicted person includes the following factors which operate, except for Item 1), in part unconsciously, or, at times, semi-consciously:

1) Deliberate lies.

Addicted persons, be they alcoholic or addicted to illegal drugs, lie and manipulate to protect their ability to satisfy the need to use their DOC (drug of choice). They also lie to themselves and come to believe their own distortions. Addicts who must buy their drugs from illegal sources and use illegal means to finance purchases, will be particularly adept at deliberate falsification and skillful manipulation.

2) Alcohol/drug-induced amnesia (blackouts).

Present inability to recall events occurring while under the influence adds to the “denial” problem. The AOD addicted person in truth cannot remember many of the negative events he/she may be accused of, which adds to the confusion, frustration and delusion of the user (and to the frustration of those close to him/her).

3) Euphoric recall.

Recall of events while AOD impaired tend to be distorted. The AOD addicted person also tends to recall only the good times, not the bad, a selective memory.

4) Denial in Significant others.

Those close to the AOD addicted person experience denial in forms similar to that of the addict or alcoholic, and tend to enable, that is, protect the user from experiencing the natural consequences of his/her inappropriate behaviors.

5) Lack of feedback or ability to reality test what's going on.

Because of the dysfunction which develops in intimate relationships, the AOD addicted person has no way of reality testing, that is, he/she is given no useful feedback about the reality of AOD use and its real impact on significant others. The usual rule in such families is to avoid intimacy and not talk about the problem.

6) Ignorance of the definition of alcoholism or addiction.

Stereotypes of the “typical” alcoholic or addict, myths, even one's own experience with an alcoholic can lead to excluding one's own behavior from the definition. For example, an individual can say:
I don’t drink or use every day
I do my school work
I never drink in the morning
I don’t crave, or need to drink or use
I don’t drink or use much when away from school during Xmas, summer, etc.

7) Toxic effects of AOD on the brain

Addictive AOD use seriously disrupts the normal functioning of the brain, not only causing dysfunction in the action of “feel good” chemicals (neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin) thereby causing craving and loss of control, but also cause dysfunction in the brain’s ability to process, store, and use information.

8) Inconsistency of patterns of AOD use, loss of control and consequences.

The individual may not get drunk every time, may not suffer negatives every time, may be able to quit for a time, etc., and will, of course, focus on the times when nothing bad happened.

9) Influence of media and culture.

Society, commercials, ads all depict alcohol as an integral part of life's activities---sports, good times, bad times, sex, etc. Not drinking is in many parts of society abnormal.

10) Sneaky disease.

The loss of control over, and addiction to, drugs and alcohol are insidious in their onset and development.

11) Stigma.

Alcoholics and addicts are considered by much of society to be weak willed, immoral, irresponsible, and even criminal. Persons who have this disease also tend to internalize this stigmatized notion of the alcoholic or addict, and tend to not only resist applying such a term to themselves, but also resist seeking help because, perhaps, they feel unworthy.

12) Professional enablers.

Even today, when persons with AOD addiction seek help, they often encounter care givers with little expertise in diagnosing and treating AOD disorders, who provide services not directly addressing the addiction. This approach enables the addicted persons to rationalize that they are getting help that may result in a return of the ability to use.

2007-08-31T06:12:00.001-07:00

Daily Recovery Tip:

Friday August 31, 2007
The Twelve Step Recovery Programs for alcoholics and addicts are free; there is no catch; no one has a hand out for any reason other than to welcome you. However, the cost for membership IS high in terms of loss of relationships, jobs, homes, possessions, self-esteem, self-worth, friendships, pain, heartache, loneliness, to name a few. BUT, the costs just mentioned have a positive side to them; the consequences and pain help the addicted person to realize he/she needs help, which is the real key to open the doors to AA and NA.

2006-12-04T11:35:00.000-08:00

Do you ever find you cannot remember a part of what happened during the period of time you were drinking, maybe an event (don't remember going to bed) or a conversation? If this loss of memory while drinking has happened more than just a few times when you first began your drinking career, and has become a pattern of behavior, then it may be a significant indicator that you have a problem with alcohol. There are two types of alcohol induced memory loss. One is called a fragmentary memory loss; this type has often referred to as a "brownout" or "greyout", and usually looks like this: I drank to the point of being drunk (beyond buzzed), and did not remember a particular event that happened while I was drinking until someone mentioned it to me the next day; then, after Iwas given a cue about the event, I remembered it. This type of memory loss is more common than the second form of memory loss that I will describe here. The greyout or fragmentary memory loss should not be dismissed as unimportant if it happens regularly enough to be considered a pattern of behavior resulting from excessive drinking. Getting drunk as a pattern of behavior will result in negative consequences and can be an important indicator of a problem.

The other type of alcohol induced memory loss is called a blackout or more technically, an en bloc memory loss. With this type of memory loss, the individual cannot recall the information (which can be about events during a short period of time, or for hours, or can be intermittent, i.e., the person goes in and out of a blackout), no matter how often he/she is reminded of it. The information is not available. En bloc blackouts that occur as a recurring pattern of behavior (even once a month, for example) are serious indicators of a problem with alcohol (or any other sedative drug). If you, or someone you know, has a such a pattern, I suggest that you seek help. See my online addictions counseling services at http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com.

2006-11-28T08:04:00.000-08:00

Do you have a high tolerance for alcohol? Are you often the one who takes care of your intoxicated friends even though you drank as much as they did? A high tolerance for alcohol can be a significant indicator of the potential to develop alcoholism. Take the free screening test available at my site http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com to see if you may have, or be developing, a problem.

2006-11-27T15:03:00.000-08:00

Do you have a family history of alcoholism, say in a parent or grandparent? If you do, then you may have up to four times the chance of developing alcoholism than a person without such a history, if you drink excessively. See http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com for more information about addictions, including free confidential screening tests.

2006-11-21T11:54:00.000-08:00

Use in the face of adverse consequences is the best rule of thumb in identifying a developing drug or alcohol problem. In other words: does my use of drugs or alcohol cause problems in significant areas of my life, such as relationships or work; do I know that my use causes these problems and do I continue to use anyway? If this scenario fits an individual, chances are that person has a problem and could benefit from help. Go to http://www.alcohodrugsos.com/ for more information about addictions counseling online and other help for an alcoohl or drug problem.

2006-11-14T15:15:00.000-08:00

Self-honesty is the key to figuring out whether or not you have a drug or alcohol problem and may need addictions treatment. Is there a nagging thought in your head that there's something wrong with the way you use? If so, then you should investigate avenues for help. Check out the alcohol abuse information on this site: http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com. Try taking the free screening tests available on this site.

2006-11-14T15:10:00.000-08:00

I sure wish someone would post about my blog or my web site. I am new to blogging and would like some feedback and help.

2006-10-29T11:47:00.000-08:00

Please check out http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com for online drug addiction and alcohol abuse counseling services, plus a lot of free addictions information, including free, confidential drug and alcohol screening tests to find out if you may have a problem. For questions, contact Jan Edward Williams, MS, JD, LCADC, an experienced, licensed addictions counselor, himself also in long term recovery.